Trusted media reviews for families
Two and a Half Men Season 3

Two and a Half Men

Season 3

September 19, 2005 24 episodes

Family ties tighten and tension rises as Charlie's wild ways clash with Alan's neuroses, leading to hilarious misadventures in love, work, and parenting.

All Episodes

Weekend in Bangkok with Two Olympic Gymnasts
E1

E1. Weekend in Bangkok with Two Olympic Gymnasts

22m Sep 19, 2005

After falling off the roof, Alan needs Charlie's help in looking after Jake, which interferes with Charlie's social life.

Principal Gallagher's Lesbian Lover
E2

E2. Principal Gallagher's Lesbian Lover

22m Sep 26, 2005

Jake gets suspended from school after drawing an offensive picture of a girl in his class that has large breasts. Meanwhile, Charlie is asked to watch over Alan's chiropractic office after pulling an all-nighter.

Carpet Burns and a Bite Mark
E3

E3. Carpet Burns and a Bite Mark

22m Oct 3, 2005

Alan has been dating a lot, and Charlie soon finds out that it has been one woman - his ex-wife, Judith. He tries to stop Alan, and even brings Rose, Evelyn and Berta to interfere - but Alan ignores them all.

Your Dismissive Attitude Toward Boobs
E4

E4. Your Dismissive Attitude Toward Boobs

22m Oct 10, 2005

Berta causes tension between Charlie and Alan, when she temporarily moves in with them

We Called It Mr. Pinky
E5

E5. We Called It Mr. Pinky

21m Oct 17, 2005

Charlie learns he can't be in a long-lasting relationship, becuase of unresolved issues he has with his mother. Jake asks Charlie for advice about a girl at school.

Hi, Mr. Horned One
E6

E6. Hi, Mr. Horned One

21m Oct 24, 2005

Ignoring Alan's warnings, Charlie continues to date Isabella until she threatens to put a curse on his manhood.

Sleep Tight, Puddin' Pop
E7

E7. Sleep Tight, Puddin' Pop

22m Nov 7, 2005

Charlie wakes up with Rose the morning after her birthday party. Her irate father comes to ask Charlie about what the future holds for him and Rose, but the unexpected happens when Evelyn shows up.

That Voodoo That I Do Do
E8

E8. That Voodoo That I Do Do

21m Nov 14, 2005

Charlie tricks Jake into taking ballet lessons, so he can get close to the teacher.

Madame and Her Special Friend
E9

E9. Madame and Her Special Friend

21m Nov 21, 2005

One of Charlie's elderly neighbors tries to seduce Alan, while Charlie tries to stop Jake from giving money to a televangelist.

Something Salted and Twisted
E10

E10. Something Salted and Twisted

22m Nov 28, 2005

Charlie helps Alan with his obsession of always having to get approval from the women in his life.

Santa's Village of the Damned
E11

E11. Santa's Village of the Damned

22m Dec 19, 2005

Alan starts dating a woman with a Martha Stewart complex. Before long she's running the house with an obsession for perfection.

That Special Tug
E12

E12. That Special Tug

22m Jan 9, 2006

Charlie sees a therapist to learn how to deal with Alan's emotional insecurities.

Humiliation Is a Visual Medium
E13

E13. Humiliation Is a Visual Medium

22m Jan 23, 2006

Charlie finds himself in a relationship that is not based on sex.

Love Isn't Blind, It's Retarded
E14

E14. Love Isn't Blind, It's Retarded

22m Feb 6, 2006

Charlie arranges a romantic date with Mia in the hopes of consummating their relationship. Alan begins to date Charlie's most recent ex-girlfriend.

My Tongue Is Meat
E15

E15. My Tongue Is Meat

22m Feb 27, 2006

Charlie has trouble keeping up with Mia's healthy lifestyle, so he begins to sneak beers, cigars, and burgers behind her back. When Mia finds out what he was doing, Charlie has to decide if he is truly in love with her or just whipped.

Ergo, the Booty Call
E16

E16. Ergo, the Booty Call

22m Mar 6, 2006

Alan has trouble deciding if he should bring his younger girlfriend to Jake's birthday party to meet his mom and his ex-wife. Rose tries to get her boyfriend to act more like Charlie.

The Unfortunate Little Schnauzer
E17

E17. The Unfortunate Little Schnauzer

21m Mar 13, 2006

Charlie is nominated for an advertising award, but he decides to boycott it because his arch nemesis always wins. The rest of his family tries to trick him into going. Rose is having relationship problems with Gordon and seeks help from Charlie.

The Spit-Covered Cobbler
E18

E18. The Spit-Covered Cobbler

21m Mar 20, 2006

Alan starts to have financial problems when he starts paying for his girlfriend's bills, so Charlie tries to get him to break up with her. Meanwhile, Judith is after Alan because he is late in paying his alimony check.

Golly Moses, She's a Muffin
E19

E19. Golly Moses, She's a Muffin

22m Apr 10, 2006

Charlie is surprised to find out that Kandi has been living with them for the last three weeks. Alan is having a tough time helping Kandi earn a living. Charlie has lost his sense because of the dry-spell he is going through.

Always a Bridesmaid, Never a Burro
E20

E20. Always a Bridesmaid, Never a Burro

21m Apr 24, 2006

Alan tries to win Kandi back. Meanwhile, Charlie starts to sleep with her mom, Mandi, and Judith gets set up with her father, Andy.

And the Plot Moistens
E21

E21. And the Plot Moistens

21m May 1, 2006

Jake's teacher has a meeting with Alan and Judith to discuss the lack of interest Jake has at school. Alan starts to fall for Francine, in a platonic way, because he is tired of the lack of intelligent communication he has with Kandi. Charlie helps Jake audition for his school musical.

Just Once with Aunt Sophie
E22

E22. Just Once with Aunt Sophie

22m May 8, 2006

A girl from Jake's school invites him to his first boy-girl party. Charlie and Alan help him get ready for it by giving him advice. Alan and Charlie get nostalgic and remember their first boy-girl party.

Arguments for the Quickie
E23

E23. Arguments for the Quickie

22m May 15, 2006

Mia comes back to town with her dance troupe and invites Charlie to her performance. At first, he decides not to go and tries to convince Alan that he no longer has feelings for her. He goes to the see the performance and Mia explains that she wants some of Charlie's sperm. Charlie responds by asking Mia for something.

That Pistol-Packin' Hermaphrodite
E24

E24. That Pistol-Packin' Hermaphrodite

21m May 22, 2006

Charlie and Mia start making their wedding arrangements. Things begin to fall apart when their two families meet each other. They eventually decide on a small ceremony in Las Vegas.

Other Seasons